Me, my dad and sister are with her again...spending our days by her bedside as the docs and attending nurses wage the latest campaign against the disease. It's a nasty little beast and we're all very tired. My folks celebrated their 46 wedding anniversary in the cancer treatment ward in a local hospital. Mom is in and out because of morphine and the general fatigue from wrestling with her unwelcome passenger. It's tough to see her so weak and frail...the woman that held me close whenever I was ill. Her once full mane of hair a bare wisp of its former glory. We sit and watch tennis - she loves tennis and can tell you all the info about the rising and established stars. It's good to be here. Dad is exhausted as the primary care giver. My sister and I live many miles away, so it's nice to help shoulder the burden with him. I wish I cold have Jesus simply show up at her bedside and wave her sickness away...but alas it's not to be.
It's good to be part of a family steeped in love - what else can we do, but sit and hope? I pray, wait and hope she finds some comfort during the latest crisis. She's a great woman whose strength and spirit have buoyed me during my many personal storms. I love her dearly and hate seeing her like this.
hey dougie
ReplyDeleteI hate cancer too! it fucking sucks!!! why did it have to take our mom away?
It was no joke I was trying to kidnap her, i was always trying to do whatever she wanted. it didn't matter. we were gonna go for it. The picture of that day at the track, we had come home and dad was like, where were you guys?! and we told him how mom had walked around the track twice and she was so proud and happy and so full of life and energy. That was over the summer in July. I was home for a few days working on my thesis and spending time with her. I was always trying to get her outside, sit on the back porch, kidnap her and take her to the track. it didn't matter, where ever we could go, I was going to take her. I did that with grandma too you know? I used to come and visit her on the weekends from NY and one time I kidnapped her with Uncle Paul and Renne and we went to the casino! somewhere in no where Virginia. We got in trouble for that one, but was I really going to say no to Grandma?! no way! she wanted to go to the casino and I was gonna take her. We had so much fun that day! just like me and mom down there on the track. We laughed as she told me a story about one of the last times she was down there and how she got chased by wild turkeys! She had me rolling. I miss mom so much, but what helps me through all of this is smiling and thinking about stories like these and crying when I need to. It's so important to be where you are. I love you so much and am sending you hugs and luv from Hong Kong. Cancer sucks! I fucking hate it!